I miss you today.  this sucks.  I feel like every time I put myself out there like hat, I get burned.  I dont even know waht happened.  All I know is that now I must move on with my life.  I never thought anyone would ever do me like niki did.  I feel that way about it, though.  I cant help it.  I love her, and she disappeared.  She said I changed.  She was the one who changed.  Grew cold and distant.  Changed the plans without even letting me know.  Used me when she needed emotional support and left as soon as I needed it.  Whatever.  Fuck it.  New meds.  Waiting for the vistaril to kick in.